ONE HUNDRED SEVENTY TWO
sorry that i loved you . sorry for causing so much unhappiness in your life, my love. but really, what can i do now except for being worried ? super super worried and yet all i can do is to ask my friends about you and text you, knowing you wont reply . this is not what i expected after we break up . really, this wasnt what i expected . not crying that often doesnt mean that i dont care, but actually it just means that i became stronger ever since last time . please dont think that because i didnt cry means i dont love you at all . cause i love everyone with all my might . even if this was a fling for you, it wasnt for me. cause i never regret knowing you . not at all . cause you use to play an important part in my life and you still will . i texted you three times, and the only time you replied me was to ask me to take care . i believe that you're different, pelase dont make me assume wrongly . i believe that this aint the ending, its the beginning for us . for us to be good friends like how we used to be last time . i remembered, before we broke up, you kept asking me whether we would be friends after it happened, i did not know how to answer you and said : we will be, but after a long time of not talking to each other. we have not been talking to each other for a month and twelth days already . its going to be two months soon, and i wonder after how long after then we would be talking . i went to taiwan, and i thought you would text me but you didnt. i held on to the thought that you would text me and on my phone till the very last minute. i was disappointed, you did not text me. i came back from taiwan, and i thought you would text me but you didnt. i kept waiting untill i lost hope and i knew i was waiting for something that would never come . i know there's something going on now, but you're not saying anything and all i can do is to be worried . i love you and i know i have done so much damage to you . i know nothing i do can mend the damage i done to you . i am really sorry . seeing things around me and i remember what we always do together . going to school everyday, walking to the bus stop and i think about you, about us . kissing you goodbye, not wanting you to go, afraid i would lose you. going up my lift everyday, looking at the bench where you always sit and wait for me to be done . sitting there, playing the stupid game on your phone . going to school, always going up the stairs, and i remembered this was the place we use to secretly give each other small notes. i wonder do you still keep the small notes i give you in your wallet. do you ? i can still name so many things that i see that will remind me about you. but whats the point of doing all this when its making me so upset. please be alright. please take care of yourself silly boy. please. thats the only thing i ask from you. please my love. please.
¶ 8:40 PM 
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